October 23rd, 1970

    Tonight’s show in Glasgow marked five days before the end of the tour. Cameron and I had spent the day relaxing in the city, happily going to see some of the attractions the city had to offer.
    Too soon it was time to get to the venue for soundcheck. The band performed two songs to test out the equipment’s connections and left the stage feeling energized.
    Dale went right to the drinks table and poured himself a sizeable glass of rum. I wondered how he wasn’t on the floor as I saw him swallow half the glass in one gulp, before refilling it and wandering about the room.
    Riot Men were back on the tour with us, having been the opening band for the English dates in July. After their performance the crowd was sufficiently excited for Amoeba, so when Cameron gave me a kiss before heading onto the stage, I wished him luck.
    “Fry their hair,” I joked.
    He winked at me, then walked to rejoin the rest of the band behind the stage. 
    I was sitting on a small couch against the wall, wondering what song they would play first, when I noticed Sylvia. She had a glass in her hand and seemed to be pacing, though trying to hide it.
    I called out to her.
    “Are you okay?” I asked.
    Sylvia frowned but sat beside me, lines of worry on her face. “Can I ask you something, Emily?”
    She seemed hesitant, so I replied with confidence. “Sure.”
    “Well…” she began, as she looked around the room. There were only a few people in the backstage area with us, but she seemed worried.
    “Do you want to go to another room?”
    Sylvia nodded. I brought her to a dressing room down the hall and closed the door behind us.
    “Do you ever wonder what… what it would be like if there was a…” she trailed off.
    I put my hand on her arm and looked at her with concern. “What happened, Sylvia?”
    “God, Emily. I’m pregnant,” she whispered. “It’s not Clyde.”
    I was taken aback, but tried to stay in the moment with her rather than let my thoughts drag me back to my own failed pregnancy.
    “Are you sure?”
    “Almost certain,” she answered.
    “Whose is it?” I asked quietly. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to know the answer.
    She clasped her hands together and twisted them with worry. “Dale,” she answered so quietly I could barely hear her. “God help me.”
    “God help all of us,” I answered.
    Sylvia asked me to keep this secret with her. She had missed two months of her period, and had already called her doctor in Aberdeen to schedule an appointment for a test.
    “You’ll come with me?” she pleaded.
    I nodded despite myself. I couldn’t let her go alone, not when I knew what that felt like.
    “Please don’t tell Cameron.”
    She was nearly begging me, but I couldn’t lie to him. Not after the guilt I felt from last time I’d been deceitful.
    “Don’t you know anyone in Aberdeen you could say you’re visiting?” she asked after I’d told her my feelings.
    “Just my great-aunt, but Cameron would want to come and see her too.” I shook my head. “I can’t lie to him, Sylvia.”
    “Clyde can’t find out,” she exclaimed. “No one can.”
    “Are you going to tell Clyde it’s his?” I asked. I was surprised at what she’d said and didn’t know what her reply would be.
    “I don’t know,” she moaned. She sat down onto one of the chairs in the room and put her head in her hands. “I know how bad this sounds, but… I hope it’s sick. Then I can just get an abortion and forget all this ever happened.” Her confession was laced with pain and anger, but all I felt was sadness.
    “It’s hard to lose a child,” I whispered.
    “Who?” Sylvia looked at me with a piercing gaze.
    “Someone I know,” I answered. This was no time to tell her what had really happened in Amsterdam and how it had affected Cameron and I.
    “I don’t know what to do,” she cried. Tears rolled down her face and I pulled her into my arms, trying to comfort her.
    “You’ll be fine,” I assured her, despite the strange envy I felt. “We’ll get this figured out.”
    Sylvia wiped her tears away and brushed her hair behind her ears before turning and taking a sip of her drink.
    My chest tightened when I saw the red wine in the glass, but there was nothing I could do except be there for her.